Please do not repost elsewhere and do not re-translate to other language from my English version.
这穿越方式绝逼不对！Chapter zero seven zero – The desired answer
“You don’t want to know why I killed Huo Ruyan?”
Seeing that the little guy’s expression keep changing but didn’t say anything, Yin Suye increased his betting chips. Actually he could see that although the little guy didn’t express any objections towards him killing Huo Ruyan, he was very clear that this incident must have left a deep trace in the little guy’s heart. If this matter is not explained clearly, a gap might appear between the two of them. The little guy don’t know how to conceal his emotions at all, letting people guess it with just a glance. This is also one of the reasons why he chose to confess right now.
Shui Ruoshan will never admit that this sentence from Yin Suye hits right on the spot! He indeed really wanted to know the reason! On the other hand, comparing to knowing the truth, Shui Ruoshan cared more about his own life! After all, no one knows if dying in this world means dying for real!
“Because Huo Ruyan will betray you in the future?”
Not wanting to bow down to Yin Suye that early, Shui Ruoshan decided to use his talents to guess the reason. Although he expressed his views regarding Yin Suye’s murder of Huo Ruyan, he actually felt very complicated in his heart. In one hand, he was very happy that Yin Suye trusted him so much that he(YSY) cut off all relationship with Huo Ruyan just from one ‘She will betray you’ from him(SRS). But on the other hand, he felt that Yin Suye was too heartless towards Huo Ruyan, to kill her off just like this without any hesitation.
One need to know, he as the author knew how Huo Ruyan going to betray Yin Suye at the end, but Yin Suye didn’t know that. Plus Huo Ruyan treated him quite well when they were young, though she started to compare their abilities after they grew up. However up until now, Huo Ruyan didn’t really do anything that will harm Yin Suye. So for Yin Suye to abandon all his memories with Huo Ruyan in the past and even became a killer all because of his(SRS) words, this showed Yin Suye scarily heartless and ruthless towards feelings!
Right now, Yin Suye could take action against Huo Ruyan for the things in the future that have yet to happen, then is it possible that Yin Suye would do the same to him(SRS) because of other matters in the future? Moreover, the things that he hid from Yin Suye were too much to count! It’s absolutely a dead end road if he really said it alright?! He has to worry about his death!
“She hasn’t done anything to betray me yet!”
This is also why Yin Suye didn’t immediately take action the moment he encountered Huo Ruyan. In his past life, she did gave him the betrayal of his life, it was impossible for him to not remember this grudge. So in his life, he simply took his revenge in advance! Moreover, she was the one looking for death afterwards; to hold a killing intent towards the little guy. For this, he has no reason to continue keeping such a dangerous person alive, in order to prevent her from hurting the little guy one day in the future. However, Yin Suye will not disclose this reason. A pure and clean person like the little guy doesn’t need to know these dirty sins.
“Then why did you killed her?”
Shui Ruoshan felt like he couldn’t catch up to Yin Suye’s strange direction of thoughts. Since Yin Suye himself knew that the Huo Ruyan right didn’t do any betrayals, with their past feelings together he shouldn’t move to destroy her ah!
What actually happened in the middle that he didn’t notice?
“She will betray me.”
He is not some God who won’t repay a grudge, it is just a matter of time. At most, he only pushed the matter with Huo Ruyan a bit earlier, nothing so strange about it.
Yin Suye, you didn’t eat your medicine properly? What you said just now is contradicting your previous words ah! Please go back and eat your medicine before coming back, alright? He felt like they can’t play happily together anymore! Life is so lonely as snow ah!
“I believed you (that’s why)!”
Looking at the little guy’s speechless face, Yin Suye knew that he(SRS) probably doesn’t understand what he said right now. In the end, he(YSY) didn’t explain anything. Instead, he gave him(SRS) this oath-like sentence as his answer. Moreover, even if he doesn’t has the memories from his past life, just by all the things Shui Ruoshan did for him, he believed that he will definitely stay away from Huo Ruyan just the same, though he might not do something like killing her. Because Huo Rutan doesn’t’ deserve his trust!
“Why you believe me?”
Though Yin Suye’s words doesn’t match his previous words, this doesn’t prevent him(SRS) from understanding it. Right now, Yin Suye is trying to tell him that he(YSY) did such a thing to Huo Ruyan because he(YSY) believed in him. Though killing people felt a bit extreme in Shui Ruoshan’s opinion, but the moment he knew that Yin Suye hated Huo Ruyan because of his words, Shui Ruoshan inexplicably felt better. Instantly, Shui Ruoshan felt his 3 views crumbling! Because of this one sentence from Yin Suye, he forgot about his(YSY) cruelty of Huo Ruyan’s death. He(SRS) seems to be ‘unable to be cured’1?
“You are trustworthy.” Yin Suye seriously told Shui Ruoshan.
If he could trust no one in this lifetime, then his life would be too much of a failure. Very obvious, in Yin Suye’s eyes, he himself in his past life was a complete failure. Even though he finally became the Supreme Human King above tens of thousands of people, he never had even one real friend. It was a lonely life where everyone in the world seems to be your enemy, a life who could drive people crazy! Actually when he was finally defeated by Huang Beichen, other than feeling unwilling, he also felt an unprecedented sense of relaxation. Finally he could leave this world that causes him feel hate and despair!
But he never expect that after he died, he was reborn!
At that time, he didn’t feel any joy from being reborn at all. What’s there was a thick sense of dissatisfaction, anger, resentment…
Why is it when he finally be free, he came back to experience again the injustice of his fate, the world that was cruel to him…
Just when he decided to completely destroy this unsightly world, Shui Ruoshan appeared in front of him and told him that he could trust him. This caused the him whose emotions were at the edge of collapsing regained a bit of reasoning. He admits it, at that moment he was touched and bewitched by Shui Ruoshan’s beautiful words. Shui Ruoshan was like a driftwood that appeared at the time he was most desperate, bringing him hope, so he hugged it tightly. Although he wanted to convince himself to believe, he doesn’t dare to do so. Because he is afraid of being betrayed again! He could no longer afford to be deceived again, otherwise the him who has lost hope for the world will really collapsed/become crazy! And so in their interactions later on, even when he keep testing Shui Ruoshan again and again, he still couldn’t really rest assured! His past experience really caused him to no longer be trustful in other people. At one side, he wished that Shui Ruoshan would stay like this forever where he can always trust him, while on the other side he keep thinking when would Shui Ruoshan finally betray him.
Contradicting and complicated.
Until later on where Shui Ruoshan did something for his sake completely beyond his expectations, letting him think that he can finally can be hopeful and has expectations, destiny once again make a joske with him. To actually let Shui Ruoshan witnessed his killing scene. If that moment Shui Ruoshan became fearful and ran away from him, he doesn’t know what kind of thing he will do at that moment! Fortunately, Shui Ruoshan didn’t let him down. But at the same time, Shui Ruoshan didn’t give him enough hope. It’s this kind of ‘not up, but not down’ feeling let Yin Suye felt extremely annoyed! He wished to place Shui Ruoshan in all seriousness in his(YSY) heart, so that whenever he(YSY) felt tired, there would be a place for him to rely on. Even if Shui Ruoshan’s tiny figure is not enough for him to lean on, but that kind of satisfaction mentally was enough to make him remain and linger.
When one get their hands on some warmth, they couldn’t bear to let go and would even want to get more.
This is the reason why Yin Suye was greedy for such warmth the more he interacted with shui Ruoshan. If he can, he really want to hide Shui Ruoshan away in a place no one else could find. This way, there will be only one person in Shui Ruoshan’s eyes and heart! But he will not do that because he really placed Shui Ruoshan in his heart. That’s why he was worrying whether his arbitrary action would caused Shui Ruoshan to be unhappy, then finally like everyone else, stayed further and further away from him. If so, his world would be just himself once again.
He couldn’t afford to pay that price anymore!
So he allowed Shui Ruoshan to interact with other people, allowed him to be overly friendly with other people, because everything was within his control so he doesn’t has to worry. But also because he already placed heavy importance on Shui Ruoshan that he couldn’t tolerate the fact that the little guy is hiding something from him. Any troublesome matter or people that might destroy the relationship between them, he will not allow it to exist. And the secret in Shui Ruoshan is a very obvious point. Since he (accidentally) let Shui Ruoshan saw his killing, some things were destined to be unable to escape, unable to deceive oneself anymore. Then no need to wait anymore, proactive attack is the best strategy. No matter what, he must get the answer he wants this time!
Raw Word Count : 2696
Banana: This month’s end, I’m going to be busy in RL so there will not be any release this Friday. Sorry for that _(;3/