Potatoes are the only thing that’s needed in this world! Chapter 15

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Chapter 15

I sat in the middle of the village square, with me being guarded by Tina, losing the freedom to my own life.

“Well then, Di Yana~ see you in a bit~” Rei waved her hands to Di Yana, turned around and left after she saw me completely given up on resisting, and which even the desire to escape had vanished entirely.

Hey… Rei, I saw your little movement just now. While you were waving your hand with a look of an overbearing CEO, your fingertip twitched a little and touched Di Yana’s breast right?

Rei, you pervert… you really do follow your heart’s desires whenever you are huh? Why are you always taking advantage of kind girls and women no matter the situation? But wait…  can such a violent Di Yana be considered as a kind girl? Rather, isn’t this retribution for Di Yana? That’s right, a shameful incident such as this will be the retribution of hers for ravaging me casually.

So I sneered and glanced at the look of Di Yana with my peripheral vision. But just before I was about to mock her, what I saw was a shy ruddy face.

Huh…?

What is happening? Di Yana? Have you truly walk down the curve path? (TL’s note: gay)

Didn’t you confess your love boldly and passionately to me yesterday? But now, why have you lost your interest completely for me?

Ah… was the reason for wearing the slightly daring panties because of this?

It’s bad… the impression of the panties is too vivid, it’s making me unable to forget.

Hurry… delete… clear the recycle bin, and delete the recycle bin!

Wait, what did I just say?

It’s not important… Anyway, you are unforgivable, Di Yana!

Ah… all of these seems to be troublesome… I want to go back…

I sat down on the floor lifelessly, with the intention of becoming a pool of milky white liquid flowing beside Di Yana’s feet, and attempting to blend myself into the background scene.

”Stand up, hurry. The test will be commencing soon.” Di Yana ordered, with the look of looking down trash, she stared at me that has now lost my solid form. Despite this, liquid is unable to speak, hence I kept quiet.

Just as Di Yana finished her sentence, a barrage of heavy footsteps sounded from far beyond the horizon. At the same time, merged within the ominous footsteps was the crisp sound of metals colliding at an interval.

I restored the shape of my head slightly, and raised my head to see who are the people that were coming.

As one can see, from afar, at the end of the village end, was a armored man radiating valiance walking towards here. On the surface of the iron green armor, reflects beams of light from the overhead sun. The armor that was radiating heatwaves to the surrounding seemed to appear even bigger in our eyes.

The armored man that was one size smaller than me in actuality is now having the aura similar of a ten meters giant in the villagers’ eyes, with dirt scrambling behind his back.

I hear it… the sound of [zawa… zawa] coming from the surrounding air of the armored man.

All the people present, every single one of them were paused in their tracks. Their mouth were shut due to the immense pressure. They gave a respectful look to the armored man that was emitting a dominating aura.

Even before the armored man spoke,  his confident figure and aura that was similar to an emperor had long already broke apart the last line of defense in everyone’s heart.

If there ever comes a day, when the god of potatoes comes to the last leg of his days…

You shall be crowned King!

But potato is still the one true god, this is the only thing that I will not make a concession about.

The armored man slowly make his way to the podium in the village square, drew out his sword, and bashed it heavily against the wooden floor of the podium, almost making a hole in the floor.

”Silence!” Howled the armored man. His brass manly voice echoed in the crowd, lingering for a long time before dissipating. Hearing that, we heed the command of this emperor, and swallowed our saliva, preparing to hear the man’s orders.

As the man took off his cool helmet with his trembling hands. Our eye sights were forcefully took away from us as our line of sights were penetrated by a beam of dazzling light.

In the end, a skinny face belonging to an old man that was similar to a mummy appeared in our retinas. But even so, a sense of subservience still appeared naturally inside our hearts.

Up until he began to speak that is.

“The golden time of the day is the morning, and money makes the world goes round.” A phrase with an unknown meaning came from that throat with a voice full of magnetism.

Why is it you again, previous village chief? Your speech from before had made me think for some time, and even made me doubt myself. And now, what kind of nonsense have you utter again?

Interesting! Isn’t there any normal person in the village chief family?

“You… What are you doing here, dad!” All of a sudden, the current village chief that was below the podium watching the situation unfolds finally rushed up to the podium, and grabbed hold of the armored old man suffering from amnesia.

There, that middle-aged man with the squared face is the village chief of our village. Although he is a bit too old, you could still see some form of resemblance of Wu De from that bearded face.

Now that I thought of this, a feeling of anger welled up inside me.

Sorry, although you might be the only normal person left in the family, but I still dislike you! Drill a hole in the ground, and bring along your son with you to become nutrients to the soil!

“Un… Unfilial son! How dare you!” The old man  shook off the hands of his son, his serious face determined without any trace of compromise. But in the end, he could not win against his son.

With a twitching face, embarrassment and a headache, the village chief dragged away the old man from the stage in a bad mood.

“The undertaking of the previous emperor has halted before it was half finished when he died, the world is now divided into three countries. Our province of Shu Han has exhausted its resources, this is now the time of crisis. The Guards and officials are busy with the courts affairs and the generals are outside fighting with their life on the line. This is because they are reminiscing the deeds of the previous emperor, and are now repaying them to you, my emperor!!!!” Following the last cry, the old man was taken away from the inspection place by Di Yana’s Dad.

What the hell are you guys doing… Am I allow to go back now?

Boom…

Right at this time, a second noise sounded from the direction where the old man first appeared.

Oh…Oh! Is it the appearance of another armored man with intimidating aura? …

Never mind. Take it that I didn’t say anything.

What came into sights of the entire villagers was a man with a half broken armor.

The once enormous dark blue armor was looking like it hasn’t been maintained for over a few tens of thousands of years, with its glow long dulled. An empty sword sheath hung at his waist meant that the sword which was symbol of knight was lost as well.

However, the saddest part was that the head of this man, was covered by a metal bucket with only three exposed small holes acting as the helmet.

This contrast is… really…

If we compared this S rank warrior with the old man, we could say that Lambert’s aura is literally the water molecules on the leaf which an ant was moving as he crawled along on the soil beside the feet of a child that was playing in the playground.

“Hehehe… I am Lambert Stevecia. Lancelot, the son of the hero [Stevecia] that killed the demon king. At the same time, I am the leader of the [S rank] adventurer squad——[Demonic sword of Fallen Abyss. Dangerous Thunder Warrior. Impact that shattered Heaven and Earth!]. Occupation is [Warrior], my title is…”

Unfortunately, no matter how Lambert announces his titles with his prideful voice, all he had gotten were our silent despises.

Without any slightest amount of perception of our thoughts or any observation of our sour-gourd liked expressions, the hermit crab crossed his arms, and shouted without bringing any disgrace to the title [Idiot] even in the slightest bit. “Today! I will be the main examiner of this inspection. Everyone, did you all feel very honored about this?”

“… Yay!” After a few seconds of silence, the crowd finally uttered that sentence lifelessly.

That’s enough… I really want to go back home. This is literally a joke.

There are important things for me to do! I didn’t come here to watch you, the hermit crab to show off. My five hundred and forty one wives are still waiting for me to go back and look after  the young gods resting in the fields!

“Now then, I presume that you guys are feeling excited as well. In that case, I won’t waste time anymore, and properly introduce the main contents with regards to this inspection~”

I have no clue whether he was deaf in the ears or blind in the eyes; or was he just stupid . Lambert ignored the dumb looks of the entire village, and carried on speaking to himself.

“When we talk about adventurers, there are four aspects with regards to their capabilities overall.” Lambert that has entered the lecturer mode seems to be in a good mood but if his helmet was to drop down now, perhaps he would use [Earth tunneling skill] to escape from the sunlight and people sights.

“Firstly, stamina is of the it utmost importance, without stamina nothing could be done.”

OK… At least the things that he said still make some sense.

“The second aspect is endurance. If you guys cannot withstand the blow from a dragon’s claw, you guys are trash then.”

Wait a sec…? What nonsense did you just say, you brat?

“The third will be magic affinity. Weaklings like you guys will be annihilated immediately once arrived at the demon continent if you guys are unable to resist the corrosion of Magic.”

Hermit crab, you have insulted people until you have reached a new height. You are literally courting death.

“Lastly, it will be determination! Without the determination of defeating the demon king, you guys will ultimately become losers that can only eat potatoes in the streets.”

Enough! I had enough! I am going up there to butcher him!

However, right at this moment… whispers sounded in my ears.

“Is it him…”

“Affirmative… Although the armor is different… But that is definitely that [Lambert]. That’s right.”

“Follow according to plan…”

“Understood.”

A sinister feeling crept up behind my spine, and I turn around immediately to look at the direction of the whispers. However…

There was no suspicious figure other than the villagers that were staring at the hermit crab with dead pan expressions.

Something… is coming…


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